When MFA is not enough

I hope you’ll excuse the format of this post. Coffee does strange things to my brain.

In the beginning, there was the username. And it was deemed good enough, because everybody on the machine was a trusted colleague. Then came machines shared by strangers, and with them the password. And it was deemed good enough, because the resources to crack it were beyond most. Then came the Internet, and the world flourished and grew. But the world contains more villains than the password, in its myriad implementations, could withstand. And thus came multi-factor authentication. And it was deemed good enough, because only someone in possession of the authenticated device could gain access.

But they were all deceived, because the service providers foretold that their users would lose their authenticated device, and lock themselves out of their accounts, and would blame them rather than their own misfortune. And so it was that, fearing their users’ wroth, the service providers gave their support personnel unfettered access to override MFA at the behest of a phone call.

Some service providers were wiser, and gave out backup codes after authenticating, thus allowing users to regain access by themselves, and promised not to give access to anybody with a honeyed voice, and reminded their users ever and anon that they should be mindful of their backup codes, and even gave them the option to be told when their account was logged into. And their users were at peace, trusting that their service providers knew what the fuck they were doing, that their files were safe, and being forever loyal to them.

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